{Losing memories begins and ends with the senses

[myheadisaprison]

Eway/Wonderland-verse PSL with hypoxic
{The Beginning}

Comments

[thisismadfreaky]

Yeah... [He squints a little, but he isn't sure that will help much.] The fun ones don't ever seem to last like the others, though.

What do you mean...? [Stops fighting? ???? Fitz, what the hell?!]

[hypoxic]

Oh, have you lost track of that too? Caitlin and Jemma used to help us try to figure out that book with the experiments in it. They've got other things to do now. I'm sure we'll forget about trying new things too, sooner or later.

[ he stirs tea and cream casually. ] There's probably not even anything out there. Maybe it's been silliness to try.

[thisismadfreaky]

I don't want to stop trying new things. [He says it like it should be obvious, like it's too important to quit.] Yes there is, there's a whole world out there, multiple worlds, I don't even know how many, but it's an entire multiverse. We just have to find the right way to access it.

[hypoxic]

[ He smiles, but it's a grim thing. ]

It figures that you change your mind right when I start agreeing with you. Always looking contrariwise, aren't you?

[thisismadfreaky]

But I never said-- [He groans and drops his face in his hands. Something is wrong. Is it possible to have an Event within an Event? Like Event-Inception or something? Or is he the only sane one left in a world of upsidedown weirdness? Cisco isn't sure, but it seems pretty likely at this point.]

[hypoxic]

If you never say, then you'll never mean. You might want to work on that during this event.

[He stirs cream into his cup, nodding firmly.]

[thisismadfreaky]

What is that, like a play on say what you mean and mean what you say? [He peeks up at Fitz from between his fingers.]

[hypoxic]

[He tilts his head thoughtfully.]

Hm. I've never heard that before. Did you make that up just now?

[thisismadfreaky]

No. [He groans and hides his face in his hands again for a moment. This is already frustrating. After a moment or two, he lifts his head and drops his hands back to the table.] Okay...how long have you been here?

[hypoxic]

The one that's more than months. [He waves a dismissive hand, though. Cisco's already asked about that, recently enough that it hasn't slipped through the sieve that his mind's become.] Are you forgetting things already? That's a shame. You've only just gotten them back.

[thisismadfreaky]

Do you know how many months? [That was possible, right? If you lose the concept of a year, just count all of the months. It was feasible.]

[hypoxic]

That's a lot of counting, Cisco. Who has the energy to keep up with that? [What a ludicrous waste of time.]

[thisismadfreaky]

I don't know, I was hoping you. [S i g h.]

[hypoxic]

Why would I bother? Every day is the same. It's always been just like this. [It's a slightly different declaration than the one he made before the event started.]

[thisismadfreaky]

And you don't question it at all? [He tilts his head a little.] You just accept that it's always the same, and that's fine? What about your family back home? Don't you remember them? [Family was never a subject they touched on much, they were both pretty touchy on for various reasons, but he thinks maybe if anything might get a rise out of Fitz, this could maybe be it.]

[hypoxic]

[Something twitches under his right eye, but otherwise his stare remains blank.]

What's that word? I don't think I have it anymore.

[thisismadfreaky]

Family? [Oh, that's just sad. How could she steal the concept of family from people?] Your mom, dad, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins? You don't...remember any of them?

[hypoxic]

[He shifts then, in sudden discomfort.]

... There's my mum. I don't... There's not much about her. But I remember her laughing.

[thisismadfreaky]

[He frowns and drops his gaze, voice quiet.] I'm sorry, Fitz.

[hypoxic]

For what? This is usually when you tell me I've made something up. I probably just need to think of an end to the story.

[thisismadfreaky]

Nobody she lose so much of who they are. Your family's part of that, I just-- [He shrugs. Doesn't matter, does it? He doesn't even know them anymore, really. The importance of the whole concept.] I hate this place.

[hypoxic]

[He nods then. Cisco's so different now that he's gotten himself restored from going away from Wonderland. Does that mean that Fitz is just as different?]

You remember other places now, don't you? What are they like?

[thisismadfreaky]

Yeah, I do... I remember things before Wonderland. I was from Central City, it's in Missouri-- [Which he probably has no reference for.] The winters there really suck, it's so cold. I dunno, I miss it, you know?

[hypoxic]

Well of course it's cold in winter... That's why we stay inside.

[The idea of any city is beyond the scope of a man who can't remember anything past a world that can be explored in its entirety in a long afternoon.]

[thisismadfreaky]

Yeah, I know. [He resigns the conversation to what it is-- he doesn't have the reference for what he's talking about anyway.] I'm not a fan of snow.